It's not easy, but it gets easier

OH RHONDA!!!  Feels like we are saying that every day.  What needs fixing now?!! She has been behaving like an ailing, old, crazy aunt.  At first, seeming so sweet & willing, and then she gave us that huge scare/near accident that has had us dotting on her every whine & complaint ever since.  “Dear, get me some new window sealant”, she said, “I’m leaking rain all over your front benches”.  And then “Darlings, I’ve nearly tossed my center roof vent off completely! Don’t you love the new sky-light I’ve created?” Or “Oh dear! I seem to be dribbling your grey water everywhere we go! Jason, be a doll and try to patch that up?” She’s been  saying that last line for days and poor Rienks has been under there with epoxy, putty, and anything he can think of attempting to patch up Rhonda’s persistently leaky grey water tank.  And here’s the thing - J and I just don’t have any live-in experience with ailing, old, crazy aunts…. We are struggling daily to meet Rhonda’s needs!  And the tensions can run high, if you know what I’m saying… care-giving can be very stressful on a relationship!

Ol' Aunt Rhonda - she can be a little demanding

It’s been 1 week since we crossed into the states. Sitting here putting “1 week” on paper, I had to check the calendar to be sure it wasn’t two… It has felt much longer than 1 week.  The thing we are seeing the most of in every town is Home Depot & Walmart.  Like we are on some disturbing tour of hardware stores & cheap stuff.  “Adjustment” would have to be the one word to describe the first week.  Adjusting to J & I being back together - like 24 hours a day, in 97sq ft of space. Adjusting to life on the road - read “spending massive amounts of time figuring out where you will sleep, eat, shower, and be safe”. Adjusting to life with Rhonda.  She’s just like all of us, the ol’ girl - lots of imperfections. In the beginning, when we first met, we didn’t notice most of them… and as people tend to do, and we saw a lot of what we wanted to see in her.  Now, we are getting intimate, real fast, and the cracks (literal cracks) are starting to show.  Here’s where the lesson is - we have to STAY; no choice but to get to know her better, and accept her imperfections, try our best to make the most of each situation.  And, we loved her from the beginning.. our eyes shining with adventure, her promising to house not just us, but our dreams & hopes of what this trip would be.  And now? Well, we must love her anyways.  We are here, on the road, thousands of miles from our respective homes. As for "our home", J & I together? We don’t have one (yet!). Rhonda IS our home. So we don’t have a choice.  I think the lesson is beautiful all the same - us being forced into it and all. How many times do we first meet someone (acquaintance, romantic, co-worker, teammate, whoever!), and at first they are the most amazing/friendly/interesting/hilarious person we know.  Then, after a few days, or dates, or weeks of working with them (when you get to know them more) you start see a few of their faults.  Maybe they have a short temper, or can be petty.  Whatever it is, their faults and imperfections peek through.  What is your first instinct then? Phase them out? See less of them? Talk about them with someone else who knows them and has surely noticed “X” about them?  

Well what would happen if you stayed? If you saw those faults and instead of turning away from the person, you tried to like or love them anyways? What would you see if you looked a little deeper? We are all different, and none of us are perfect…. And just like Rhonda, as we age, we all have our own cracks, dents & weak spots - places where pain, or past insults have made our structure less strong, less shiny, with spots that creak and whine under pressure. 

Our “Rhonda Metaphor” had us thinking. And me being a woman who enjoys her “beauty-time”….. Well, what if we gave Rhonda a mini-makeover??!!  A little injection of fun, to lift all of our spirits and raise the general vibration… I know I feel like I need one and I’ve only been on the road one week - Rhonda has been for over 30 years!!  Something cosmetic and frivolous, after all the structural poking & prodding she has been subjected to? A little pampering.   

Today we gave Rhonda a new stripe.  We did away with the burnt-orange of the 80s in favor of a pretty “Vintage Teal”…. from Home Depot, of course. 

-S

**Update: This was written about 5 days, 7 towns and 5 states ago, and I am pleased to say we haven’t seen the inside of a Home Depot since! (Everyone knock on wood…. )

'After': Rhonda feeling fresh in Vintage Teal